First, I need to confess:
Because OysterBed7 isn’t about ME, it’s about God’s hope for low libido ladies, I get angry with myself. Occasionally, another author’s beautifully articulated post goes viral. Unannounced, the ugly oystershell of jealousy floats to the surface of my mind.
I know jealousy/envy are dumb! I pray my competitive nature at bay. When I start to feel those pangs (which are my own insecurities) I start tweeting away, promoting the fabulous posts of the one’s I’m jealous of. Now, don’t think just because I’m tweeting you I’m coveting your writing skill. But, then again…..
(Please join me in prayer that I can overcome jealousy and envy with humility and gratitude to be a part of this effort to improve the integrity of marriage.)
“Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good,” Romans 12:21.
2. I still don’t have a good grasp on blogging ‘etiquette.’
3. My enthusiasm causes impetuousness. Sometimes, I comment, hit enter and wish I could edit. (note to self: continue praying for self-control.)
3. My enthusiasm causes impetuousness. Sometimes, I comment, hit enter and wish I could edit. (note to self: continue praying for self-control.)
4. The written word can be tricky. Voice inflection can’t be heard, body language not seen.
5. Writing about sexuality helps my libido. (Low libido ladies, to increase desire there really is something to this ‘start thinking about sex in the morning’ thing.)
6. OysterBed7 and its readers are prayed over for protection. Writing and reading about sexuality in marriage sometimes draws Satan’s attention.
7. Where would OysterBed7 be without the warm and sincere members of Christian Marriage Bloggers Association? They’ve calmed fears and spurred me on. Check out this link and peruse the different blogs.
8. Do I think about low libido remedies all the time? No. Mr. Muscle helps by sending me emails for post topics.
9. Blogging is serious fun. I like to have fun, but it’s imperative to write responsibly and in a God honoring way. Other people’s lives are serious business. Especially, since I’m NOT a counselor or medical professional.
10. A prayer journal is kept for those who have asked for prayer or confided troubles in comments or emails. You are all cherished!
11. There is nothing new under the sun. Each blogger just puts individual spin or humor on the age old human condition.
12. Blogging is instant publishing gratification. I don’t have to type a manuscript or article and send it in and wait for the rejection. There is no rejection, unless someone wants to argue in the comments.
13. It took all year to build a thicker sexuality-writing skin. There are still sexual Puritans out there. We can’t be sexual Puritans anymore. Vocal balanced Christian voices are needed. SEX IS GOD ORDAINED. Take advantage of society’s relaxed nature about sex and talk about it.
14. Your story is different from mine. My story isn’t going to minister to everyone. I realize this and try to write taking in many different scenarios or at least keep it in my while I’m writing.
15. Why does writing inspiration materialize when there is no note-taking ability to record Pulitzer Prize thoughts? Then, in ten minutes, they’re lost. My memory is a sieve that retains NOTHING, esp. past 7 p.m., I’m the best gossip around because I can’t remember a dern thing.
16. Streamlining has been learned. I prefer posts (reading and writing) that are around 700 words.
16. Streamlining has been learned. I prefer posts (reading and writing) that are around 700 words.
17. Public domain and personally owned images are a blog’s best photo friends.
18. In spite of what I confessed about jealousy, I do love to network and promote fellow bloggers. God uses each of our voices to reach that one person. I like building blogosphere and real-life relationships. My email is pearlmail3 at gmail dot com.
18. In spite of what I confessed about jealousy, I do love to network and promote fellow bloggers. God uses each of our voices to reach that one person. I like building blogosphere and real-life relationships. My email is pearlmail3 at gmail dot com.
19. I would kill for a good cleaning lady. The one we have currently has turned into a slacker since she started blogging.
20. OysterBed7 has cost us about $50. If money happened to fall out of the screen, I’d help the economy and hire a cleaning lady. But, Pearl profit was never our intention.
21. It’s self-esteem building to have knowledgeable discussions with 20-somethings about blogging.
21. It’s self-esteem building to have knowledgeable discussions with 20-somethings about blogging.
22. The more I research the sexual-spiritual link, the more fascinating and satisfying it becomes.
23. More books have been devoured in the past year than in the last five combined; firstly the Bible, then mostly sexuality topics.
24. Scholarly articles challenge my science understanding and have been an empowering re-awakening. Psychoneuroendocrinology is fun to type and say.
25. Many in my family know I have a marital intimacy blog. They’ve been warned to read at their own risk.
After a whole year of being anonymous, find out my real name in, Out of the Shell.
#5 & 6 are so very true.
#5- You think more about sex, you are more open to it, you get better results, you enjoy it more…so, you think more about it, you are more open to it and so on and so on.
And #6, you try to share more with others and be a positive witness for Christ in this area, it does seem to draw a bulls eye on your marriage sometimes.
As for #19, if you lived in my area, I would love to come clean for you, as I find it most relaxing and therapeutic. Then, when I finished cleaning, we could sit and chat over a cup of coffee. I imagine we could find some interesting topics to discuss. 🙂
#22-so true here as well…God has really designed us so wonderfully. If only we would get out of the way and do it the way he has instructed us to in the Instruction Book. (alas, it is that way with all that is written there, isn’t it?) I am so glad he is so very patient with his creation.
Keep writing, we are enjoying the content 🙂
Thanks for your encouragement, Tammy. What a servant spirit you have! Just coffee? I’d make you a really good lunch if you’d clean my house. 🙂 It would be fun to have a nice long chat. I value others’ opinions on sexuality. #22 will probably be my focus this coming year….we’ll see.
You keep on keeping on, my dear friend! Write to those that God has brought to your ministry. Don’t worry about the number of followers you have because in reality, they are not our followers, they are the Lord’s! And by the way, I enjoyed the ‘off the cuff’, unresearched, Pearl post today!
I’m in the process of making a visual aid about the Lord’s followers to put on my bathroom mirror! 🙂 I’ll share it with you when it’s done.
Thanks for being REAL for your readers, Miz Pearl!
~Jason
(another year-old blogger…)
J&T, I so enjoy your tweets. Always good stuff. You guys do real very well!
I appreciate that you have defined your nitch and work to continue to blog to that – they need your voice!
Thanks to you and Lori for your continuing support and for stopping by so often. I always appreciate it!
“My enthusiasm causes impetuousness. Sometimes, I comment, hit enter and wish I could edit. (note to self: continue praying for self-control.)”
Just to encourage you, I have yet to read anything you said that needed editing. For myself though, I struggle with “open mouth, insert foot, echo internationally”. :- So I’m trying to take more time and think before pressing the Enter key. 🙁
“It took all year to build a thicker sexuality-writing skin. There are still sexual Puritans out there. We can’t be sexual Puritans anymore. Vocal balanced Christian voices are needed. SEX IS GOD ORDAINED. Take advantage of society’s relaxed nature about sex and talk about it.”
Yes! I _really_ wrestle with this. First, because at 43 I’m single and don’t have a clue about marriage and intimacy, I keep hearing the “Uh, Greg, this is none of your business–what are you doing here?” in my head. But then was encouraged by this post:
http://beggarsdaughter.com/how-legalism-demonizes-sex/
So believe I need to know what I believe and why, and have an answer for my faith, including biblical sexuality/intimacy. It is imperative we stand for the truth even as the days grow closer to where our simple standing for biblical sexuality are attacked and persecuted. I also don’t want to waste time not learning what I can from mature believers who have so much to share about what, and how, God has worked in their lives and marriages.
Greg, Impulse control is my weak spot. But, I guess I haven’t done too much damage from what your nice words say. I admire your godly take on sexuality. It is important to know where we stand on sexual issues, single or not. THANK YOU so much for posting the Beggar’s Daughter’s link. What an exceptional post! I pray other readers will jump over and read it from here. Blessings to you, Greg. Thanks for your support.
I loved reading your realizations! I share some of them. Some of my family also know that I write a marital intimacy blog, and the word “sexpert” was introduced to the conversation once…causing raised eyebrows and a jaw dropping. I don’t know that I’m a “sexpert”…although my husband says I’m not too shabby. LOL.
Keep doing what you’re doing! I love having your voice in the marital intimacy blogosphere!
J, ‘sexpert’ is such a compliment and I agree with them!! You have been a blessing to the OysterBed. I so appreciate the tweeting and hashtag mentoring! We still need to work on the ‘Rock the Boat’ Sex Cruise. 🙂
Excellent “lessons learned!” I struggle with some of these too, especially the first one. For the record, you have been a great encouragement to me! Regarding #15, I cannot remember good ideas to save my life! So I have Evernote (free program) on my phone, Kindle, and both computers. (Pretty sure I learned about Evernote from Lori Byerly!) You type an idea into a note when it comes to mind, then the program syncs it with your other devices. So if you get a great idea while sitting in the doctor’s office you type it into your phone, then later you open the program on your computer and, lo and behold, there’s your great idea!
Gaye, I think we have much in common and I appreciate you, my sweet friend! Plus, you do great work! THANKS for the Evernote info, esp. since it can be synced. I’ll look for Evernote on my iPad. I have to get a new phone, though. Mine is from the dark ages.
#1 I struggle with pangs of jealousy sometimes too… or even just little poings! But they’re not God-honoring. However, you’re not alone sister!
#3 I try to send a quick prayer heavenward before responding to comments on my blog. When responding to others’ blogs, I often let the comment sit there for a bit, open a new tab, work on something else, and come back to it.
#4 So true.
#13 Amen, chica! Sex is God ordained!
#15 Some nights, I frantically try to type away little notes to myself on my cell phone so I can remember in the morning and Adam wonders what all the bright light is about. Why do all my best ideas hit me when I’m lying in bed trying to fall asleep?
These were fun to read. Keep up the good work! I love your blog!