January 1st hands us an opportunity for better. It’s an opportunity to add new helpful habits or take away old harmful habits from your life. Either way, adding or subtracting, the ultimate goal is to move toward something better, becoming more.
For us who struggle with low sexual interest, it’s the opportunity to think about improving our interest regarding “birthday-suit-time” with our husbands.
Not everyone sees the path to opportunity in the same way, though.
Some see resolutions.
Resolutions involve resolve, a firm determination to change. There are different reactions to the word “resolution.” Some people hear “resolution,” and appreciate the chance to reinvent themselves. Others hear “resolution,” and their sphincter muscle tightens up because it is just too much work.
Some see goals.
A goal is resolution’s sweeter, younger sister. A goal is less intimidating and elicits less emotional response from people. The best goals are smart (specific, measurable, agreed-upon, realistic, time-based). For some goals are perfect, for others they are too rigid.
Some see decisions.
Decisions are a powerful tool toward change.
You are in charge of your transformation! Decisions are a personal choice. Choices are options. Choices and options imply personal power.
Some see fresh starts.
A fresh start is less about reshaping an old habit and more about creating something new. It is a blank piece of paper waiting for you.
For some it requires less mental and emotional energy to alter an existing habit through resolution, goals, and decisions, than to create something new. However, for others, it’s easier to completely let go of the old and start from a new beginning.
Every wife is different and chooses for herself the best route to finding her interest in sex. For me, it was through a fresh start.
“Tomorrow, is the first blank page of a 365 page book. Write a good one,” Brad Paisley.
I like the fresh start concept of this quote. However, you don’t have to write a whole new book to improve your sexual interest! When I started to contemplate a more active role in our marriage bed, I only wanted to write a new chapter entitled “Feeling Sensual Again.”
Writing a chapter feels less intense than writing a whole new book.
A new chapter need only contain 52 blank pages, one page per week. 52 pages is a lot of baby steps. And if you need help with your baby steps, it just so happens there is an amazing book I wrote (*winkwink*) called Unlock Your Libido: 52 Week Sex Drive Transformation.
Whichever mental angle you approach change from, be gentle with yourself. Success is a matter of small, do-able things. Baby-steps equal sanity. Stay sane to get sexy!
The opportunities of January 1st all boil down to…whatever!
“…whatever you do, whether in word or deed, do it all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him,” Colossians 3:17.
And remember, it is OK to pray about sexual intimacy, especially when your desire is to strengthen your marriage and align it with God’s will. The best sex starts with prayer.
“… I will do whatever you ask in My name, so that the Father may be glorified in the Son,” John 14:13.
