This wasn’t an optimum day for pictures.   It was overcast and windy.  However, rain washed away our first two appointments.  I was determined to get this done.

We were just a few miles from our house at Ft. Fisher, taking photos.

I assumed a ‘JCPenney pose’ (you know, posin’ all cool like a JCPenney ad…), leaning against a sturdy live oak tree within feet of the ocean.  It wasn’t an ancient monster, but had withstood its share of hurricanes.

It held me up as I lost balance from a big gust of wind surprising me from behind.

That’s when I felt the tree sway almost imperceptibly.  My eyes couldn’t see the tree move.  My hand picked up the vibration.

There’s a reason this copse of Live Oak trees remains after numerous hurricanes.   Trees use adversity to grow deep roots and develop flexibility.  Marriages strengthen the same way.

You don’t have to be married a long time to have anchored roots.  The roots of shared faith in Jesus and belief that God’s Word is truth cements your foundation.   Flexibility develops by refusing to act selfishly when heated moments flare.

When hurricane force gales threaten your marriage, swaying in grace allows your relationship to deepen its roots.

Grace isn’t my first instinct.  Tearing into him verbally is satisfying, for the moment.  Lashing out is immediate gratification with long term consequences, especially when I lash out about the most intimate act of marriage.

Extremely sensitive emotions anchor deep when it comes to sexual intimacy.  The grace of Jesus needs to overflow in abundance when it comes to your sexual relationship.

The strongest marriages sway in grace, especially when it comes to sexual intimacy.

Life is about the moving forward, gaining insight and understanding.  You grow stagnant when you remain in the same place, even if that place is pleasant.  We are called to grow in maturity and grace.

Sexual intimacy is not a place where you should remain stagnant, especially if it is a point of conflict.  We grow the most working to overcome conflict using Christ as our origin of grace.

By deciding beforehand to act in grace, it’s easier to sway when the storms come.

Swaying in grace knows that conformity is not the answer, unity is.

Swaying in grace forgives generously.

Swaying in grace allows differing opinions and differing methods.

Swaying in grace communicates lovingly and diplomatically.

Swaying in grace sees the good in all motives.

Swaying in grace works best when prayer covers all aspects of your marriage.

Swaying in grace wants the best for your spouse.

Swaying in grace prioritizes the lovemaking needs of your spouse.  This does not mean that the higher drive spouse dictates frequency.  Neither does this mean that the lower drive spouse dictates frequency.  This means that you lovingly look to the needs of your spouse and adjust unselfishly to a mutually agreed upon standard.

“Give, and it will be given to you. A good measure, pressed down, shaken together and running over, will be poured into your lap. For with the measure you use, it will be measured to you,” Luke 6:38.

The strongest marriages sway in grace, especially when it comes to sexual intimacy.

“Love each other with genuine affection and take delight in honoring each other (show preference to your mate above yourself),” Romans 12:10.  The parenthesis are mine and boy do I need to remember it!